TOKENS - FULL CYCLES. FIERCE JOY. PRAYING MANTIS.

She comes to my door, Praying Mantis. And she's pink. Yellow. Lavender. Over the week she's appeared in my bike seat, on the papyrus, & in the orchids. She's persistent. Or we're being colonized.  An entire family of fierce, yet softly joy-toned guides that call for meditation, stillness, & dreamwork? Inviting us to move from a gesture of precise curiosity, striking only after careful thought + contemplation? Okay, yes. We accept. We're stopping. We're listening.

 

Q. I'm overflowing, that's happening, it's been years in the making, & the returns are overwhelming, I'm blessed. I have more than enough. And I want to share it. There's not enough of me left to share it. For so long I wanted to share it with a family. Now that I have one, I see their eyes glaze over with my passions. I know I need to switch gears, but my work is on fire! It's what I do, it's what I care about, it's interesting. I wish they cared enough to see what's happening. It's crazy...I've moved thru two life partners who didn't grow fast enough for me.

 

Praying Mantis appears when we're in the building/expansion {lunacy} phase. She's here to support our individual capacity for expansion. She responds to our chaos, our frenetic gesture with stillness. She's silent. In many cultures, she is the keeper of questions & dreams. She looks at you, tilts her head, all big eyes, & wonders: Are you moving, as your truth? Are you still, as your truth? You aren't sharing in what you've built, unless you can be still enough to experience your loved ones. It doesn't go one way. It's letting ourselves breathe into the air we share. A life of conscious cycling: inhale. exhale. 

There is a word for God in my culture, Bathala. It means the enchanted atmosphere between the masculine & feminine. If you are providing all the masculine needed to fertilize your own life, & all the holding...well...you will burn out, or burn others. The exuberance is feminine. The joy & the softness. The destroyer is feminine. In each phase, we must expand our capacity for the current phase to move forward. So this moment is about expanding the capacity for building/expansion, & in your case, specifically, for expansion itself. Can you expand yourself to include their expressions? In their fullness? Can you put the masculine, & the feminine destroyer on hold to breathe in your family? This is about that sacred pause. Are you able to take in what you've built, & own your piece, while also respecting & appreciating their autonomy, their perfection & distinct moments?

Reception is the ultimate gift of the feminine.

Their eyes glaze over after your eyes glaze over. If you've done it long enough, they're just beating you to it.

 

Q. The more intentions I become honest about, the more I realize how much help I need. And how much I hold onto, because I've been holding these inner promises to myself with no possible way to make them all happen. I'm already doing a lot. I see how I do everything, actually, even when I have support. There's just so so much on my consciousness, & it never really feels like I have the support & I do all kinds of holding things, like waiting to eat, or collecting nostalgic objects that block my creativity with their clutter + meaning, & not going to the bathroom so I end up with cramps. I don't think all the goal-making is causing it, I already had these issues, I'm just seeing how related they are. I really don't believe the answer is to go backwards & give up some of the circus I want for myself. I believe I'm supposed to move forward & make these things happen. Do I focus on the individual intentions, or the grounding goals? 

 

There are so many opportunities to want. There's so many invitations to clarify your deepest longings. There's so much insistence & belief in the necessity for desire. I'm so over all of that.

I talked to a gorgeous business coach on her hike along the coast of Hawaii yesterday. She's in her early 30's, sexy, fit, & just luscious in the face. She wanted to go the next level, to break thru from a $300k year to the new mythical, "seven figures." She told me the foundation of her coaching: "Some will. Some won't. Who cares. Who's next."

It was so ugly, & shocking, I forgot that I was trained in that model, for years. I really have forgotten that core Western message to dismiss your fellow humans, & in that, your own humanity. A flood of memories came forward, "Whatever is takes," "By any means necessary (BAMN!)," "If you're not playing big, you're not playing." And other random slogans that dare the daring into fucking themselves into monetary entrapment. I felt a tide of sadness as she stood there, somehow lonely with the mother sea behind her, wanting affirmation that she wasn't playing full out. I saw how she was leaning on her looks, to also "make these things happen."

All of her fear had come to the surface in the form of fear-based threats to her clients. She wanted them to grab their balls & check-in with themselves. To move thru life proving themselves to themselves. Our whole society is built on this premise. As if acting like that doesn't come with collateral damage to our hearts & the planet. As though we weren't all obligated to each other. As if what's ours in the unseen, heavenly realms could be stolen. As if we had to force our evolution, & we could really miss out on the gifts of this life by letting life unfold.

What's truly yours has always been yours. It's already unfolding. Your impulses come with a Blessed Village to make them manifest here, now. You are already karmically entwined with those who will build out your work with you. You don't need to hold so tightly. You need to take in nourishment, & release what's not needed. Go pee, dammit. 

That's your signal to let go. When you gotta go. Go. 

Let it be a practice in mindfulness. Eat in silence once a day. Close your eyes. Conscious cycling.

So the answer is, plan your Solar Projections, so you know your promises to yourself this year. Clarify your Lunar Commitment Cycles, so you know your specific goals over the next 1-3 months. Distinguish your Daily & Weekly Process Rhythms so you know exactly what needs to happen to make it all inevitable. Then, focus on your Grounding Goal. If chosen correctly, it should be propelling, juicy, & weighted.

Most people will not be able to their Process Rhythms. That's just true. If that's curious to you, then that's your learning edge. If this is a season where you can do them, then you know, you can see how fulfilling your Solar Projections is inevitable. However. We have ancestral trauma.  We have inherited shame. We have broken neurology. We have blissful, content pieces to our lives. We live with the conversations, commitments & scarcity of others. We have other commitments that supersede these goals. We have a society that is in a Great Turning. And, in every moment, it's all possible. Miracles happen everyday. People make miracles, every single day. 

Praying Mantis includes your desire with her questions. She has no judgements or need to argue with reality. And, she has a different invitation to you. What's the quiet dream, that's moving thru you now? What truth is making it's way thru your hands? How does it feel as a grounding goal?Just make that happen. Let go of the rest.

She isn't afraid of holding, indeed, her own arms are jaws that fiercely hold faster, heavier prey. But only in moments, & only after a choice hunt, when opportunity has presented itself. Don't worry about all there is to do. What must you pursue? Because of design & a lucid impulse? The easy-kill, well within your ability? Do that.

Praying Mantis sits still, & when the time is right, she follows the energy with the focus of a stealth & sure huntress. With free hands, she clamps down, relentless, & rips into her commitments. If something is too big, too much, or too fast, she knows when to retreat. And she does. No drama

For the most part, she's just peachy. She's freaking pink. She flies on wings of canary. Can you let go enough to bring fierce joy into your heart floor? Can you play? Can you find a stillness that's colored with softness, curiosity, & clarity? Can you create enough quiet to let yourself be infused with silence, stillness, & happiness? Enough that it changes your very appearance?

 

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Spiraling out, into your legacy...

The industrialized world didn't close it's cycles. It started things with the intention of perpetual growth. There were no plans for communities when industries fell, like the car industry in Detroit. China didn't consider the loss of giant family gatherings, the basis of their culture, when they made the 1-child rule. Industry made plastics, with no plan for decomposition. And now "they" are working it in, racing to repair cultures, communities & ecosystems. Even Lego has set aside millions + years to transition to Earth-friendly materials + processes.  

 

As they awaken, to sustainability, we need to awaken to our personal, financial & communal sustainability. 

 

As the sky turns dark, bring these questions, & set aside time for silent inquiry:

 

How can I close my cycles? 

How can I bring a rhythm of inhale + exhale to my life? 
-Am I balancing the movement with the stillness?
-Am I balancing the taking in, & the giving out?
-Am I letting myself be present to my nourishment - or ensuring my nourishment, & then releasing what's not needed?

Am I consciously watching what I feed my eyes, my ears, & my heart? How about what I create, in word, thought or deed?

What's my contingency plan? Like at the end of the day, how do I want to end my relationship to my movement? Is it a moment in time, with a specific event, outcome, or experience I create for others? Do I want to pass it on, dissolve it, or to bring it to a culmination? How will I let go?

 

"I practice patience. Right movement. Full cycles. And fierce Joy."

 

xx, Maya

p.s. I am all over these two grounded, sublimely supportive offerings from my dear real-life friends in our circle of legacy sistren:

Carrie-Anne's 10 Days to a Simple & Sincere Meditation Practice

Lisa's 2-Minute Chocolate Meditations, by subscription. (going in the Solstice stockings)