Dad-to-dad? If you can, get a postpartum doula. Whether your partner & baby are healthy or ill or “complicated,” 90% of the stress - good, bad, and PHYSICAL, are eased by the presence of a regular bit of extra, intentional mothering. You want to shoulder the family burdens, we know. You want to be a hero. You want to wake up nights & rub feet & make tea & change diapers & make dinner & read little ones to sleep & make an income & be by her side, listening to everything she says & say all the right things back. You want to do whatever they ask. And. No you don’t. You don’t have the hormones for most of that, so you & I know you can try, but it’s probably not exactly right. Making you suddenly a huge additional source of stress (dang!). A doula is the best friend you most need right now, able to sense what’s most needed (food? dishes? supplements? a shoulder to cry on? experts?) & willing to step in with the “right answer” you wish you gave. She’s got a real-deal toolkit & probably has more space in her little finger than you have on vacation. Check out this page to see if it resonates, then ask around for someone in your area…David http://earthboundsouldoula.com/ — withDeanna Norris Birth Doula.

Dad-to-dad? If you can, get a postpartum doula. Whether your partner & baby are healthy or ill or “complicated,” 90% of the stress - good, bad, and PHYSICAL, are eased by the presence of a regular bit of extra, intentional mothering. You want to shoulder the family burdens, we know. You want to be a hero. You want to wake up nights & rub feet & make tea & change diapers & make dinner & read little ones to sleep & make an income & be by her side, listening to everything she says & say all the right things back. You want to do whatever they ask. And. No you don’t. You don’t have the hormones for most of that, so you & I know you can try, but it’s probably not exactly right. Making you suddenly a huge additional source of stress (dang!). A doula is the best friend you most need right now, able to sense what’s most needed (food? dishes? supplements? a shoulder to cry on? experts?) & willing to step in with the “right answer” you wish you gave. She’s got a real-deal toolkit & probably has more space in her little finger than you have on vacation. Check out this page to see if it resonates, then ask around for someone in your area…David http://earthboundsouldoula.com/

— withDeanna Norris Birth Doula.